Thunder

“I’m not where I used to be … but I’m not where I wanna be either.” Those words from Eric Ward this morning really struck me. He had just finished singing the song Thunder in Me, which he wrote a few years ago. Throughout the song, he was really emotional, and at many points, his voice broke. The words are really awesome to begin with: “You thunder in me, Shaking me to change.You’re burning what’s inside me, Only You remain. You were broken, beaten, Your blood poured out for me. King of the redeemed, To You we will sing! Worthy, you are worthy, Worthy is the Lord…” The music continues to build and climaxes with with Worthy is the Lord!

What he was saying was how those words, as he began to sing them, really hit him. Afterward, we were joking that it was funny that he wrote a song that ended up ministering to himself. But I guess that is pretty cool at the same time. The point he was making is that this burning, this shaking, is not an easy thing. We keep choosing wrong decisions, and follow wrong paths, but that is a part of the process. It’s the refining, the the burning that brings the purification. And as he spoke these words, I felt exactly what he was saying. I am so glad that I am not where I used to be. But I am so not where I want to be; where I long to be. I am on the road, and even when my heart feels like it’s a million miles away from the Lord, the faith I have inside continues to be unshaken that He is who He says He is. It’s the desire and longing of my heart that spurs me on when times are dry. A day is coming when the Lord will return, and all that we have prayed and hoped for will be fulfilled. “We are waiting For Your great return, Awaken the watchmen! Let the incense burn!Gather the people iIn the House of the Lord. Surely He is coming, Sound the alarm! Worthy, You are Worthy, Worthy is the Lord!”