We had islands up and down the crick, went hunting for crayfish, and built hopelessly impossible rafts that never floated.
My brother, Matt, turned 49 a couple days ago. I wrote part of this back in 2009 for his 34th birthday. I thought I would update that post and add in some more memories and photos.
Growing up, we lived in the country where it was quiet and peaceful. There weren’t too many kids my age around, so it was up to me and my brother, Matt, to create our own worlds. And create them we did. With acres of beautiful woods, miles of the Chuctanunda Creek (pronounced “crick” for those readers from the midwest), the best sand pile ever (courtesy of the yearly dump truck load of sand from Dad), rope swings, cobbled together bikes, go carts, mini bikes, an amazing swingset, and ramshackle forts … we lived outside. (For more on this topic – check out my post about Life on the Crick.)
We had islands up and down the crick, went hunting for crayfish, and built hopelessly impossible rafts that never floated. All they did was succeed in falling apart and getting us in trouble. After all, “Mom, we weren’t in the water, we were just trying to not get wet. It wasn’t our fault it fell apart, honest!” Once, Matt even tried to hollow out a canoe out of a log. It really didn’t work at all. Matt was daring – I would imagine things and he would attempt them. We built ramps for our bikes in the driveway and Matt bravely attempted to jump them. One time, however, he did succeed in getting a bunch of rocks embedded into his forehead. Apparently, my ramp design left much to be desired.
We played cops and robbers on bikes, and hide and seek late at night when our friends from church would come and visit. We’d climb trees and Matt was never afraid to climb all the way up – he was seriously a monkey when he got in a tree. We’d play Matchbox cars and Legos and spent time building worlds out in the sandpile for hours… it was great. We didn’t miss much without a TV.
Dad would take us with him when he went to Jeff’s (a local salvage yard) and in those days it was ok to just walk around in junk yards. So we would play in the cars and we had our favorites – imagining what it would be like to drive. Some of the cars in there were actually better looking than some of the ones we drove as a family, which always made us laugh. We played hard together and worked hard together.
I remember when Mom and Dad gave us the news that we were going to have a new brother or sister. We were sitting outside of Stewart’s in Hagaman. Mom said, “If it’s a girl her name will be Sara,” and Dad said, “If it’s a boy, his name will be Zachary.” Matt and I looked at each other in the back seat and said Zachary? What a weird name. But October rolled around and Sara was born. (There will be a post on the life and times of Sara, aka Lilly Carbunkle, for sure.)
We knew how to run a wood splitter and stack a shed and keep the house warm when we were very young. There was a time he chucked firewood at me in on of our fights (I was the antagonizer). At night we would talk for hours and hours, often being interrupted by Dad or Mom’s bellowing, “Boys, go to sleep now!” Sometimes in the summers, we would put up a tent down by the crick and camp out with a little fire. Of course we both always went camping with Dad in the woods. Later on, when we grew up, I would come home from college in the summer and we would sleep out in the camper in the front yard because we knew we could talk there and stay up late.
I liked to argue with Dad and Matt was not one of many words. So anytime we would get in trouble, I would keep going and going, on and on, trying to prove my point and debate. One time after an hour-long conversation, we were back in our room (we shared until we were teens), Matt said, “You know if you would just shut up we could have been playing an hour ago.” He wasn’t wrong though. One time when he was going to get a spanking, I came up with what I thought were two brilliant ideas (obviously tried by many before us) which were: multiple pairs of sweats, and slide some magazines in there so it wouldn’t be obvious. It did not work on Dad.
Matt graduated from high school in 1993 and then he was off to the Army. He would drive up from KY and visit me in Winona Lake and check out the coolness of Indiana. Needless to say, he was unimpressed. He ended up in Colorado where he met Trish and they got married. We all flew out for the wedding and it was a great time — especially playing video games and skee-ball til the wee hours at Dave & Busters the night before the wedding. They had two dogs and lived kinda close to the mountains. (Everything in Denver is way further than it appears, I learned. And it takes 45 minutes to get anywhere.) In 1999, some friends of mine at Grace were bored over fall break. I said, if you could go anywhere right now, where would it be? They said, the Rocky Mountains. So I said, well let’s go! And so we got in my Acura and did just that. I called Trish and asked her if was cool and we wanted to surprise Matt. So 1,000+ miles and 16 hours later, when I showed up at his door at 6am, he was just coming out to walk the dogs, and he just stood there staring at me, like how are you here right now. It was hilarious. He took us up the mountain trails in Trish’s brand new Durango. She was like, “Matthew you better not put a scratch on this!” as we drove on dirt roads with sheer drop offs and no guard rails. I also visited them with Dave Carey on our trip west to Arizona and we enjoyed seeing the Garden of the Gods, Seven Falls and Red Rocks as well as the company of the ever-hyper Santana. Also, I will never forget the time when they stopped by on their way to NY at my house in Winona, and their dog Andi came in, looked at my Christmas tree and lifted her leg and peed all over it. Makes me laugh to think about that.
Soon, Matt and Trish were off to NY to start a family, and after a short stay there, landed in Connecticut for a while. They have three kids — Abrianna, Alessandra, and Rafaele. Raf is the only one left in the house for the next year and then he is off to college. Matt works for the military building submarines. One time I called him and said, “Where are you?” He said he was standing on the deck of the USS (I can’t remember) which was a ballistic missile submarine. I was like, “Wow that is so sweet! Take a photo for me!” He laughed and said, “Ummm no, they take the cameras out of the phones here, and you know… national security.” Because he works where the naval bases are, they moved to Hawaii for 5 years and recently moved back to the mainland. They stopped here on the way through to Maine and it was so good to see them — how tall Rafaele is now! Matt and his dog, Rocco the Ridgeback, are always out hiking and doing the outdoor stuff. They have traded the mountains and beaches of Hawaii for the mountains of Maine.
Matt is still not one of many words, has his dry sense of humor, and a strong love and loyalty to his family. Our conversations often take place while I am driving and he is going to a grocery store or making dinner, so I get to hear all those snippets of life. One of my favorites ones was being on speaker phone when he was teaching Rafaele to drive. But whether it is politics or cars or life stuff, I always enjoy the talks. Growing up, my brother was my best and closest friend, and even though we are half of the USA apart, we are bound by all the incredible experiences that shaped us and bonded us forever together.
