Adversity = Authentic Refining

Last night at the Meeting Place, Bob was speaking on the love of God. He used a passage from Romans that struck me. “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love” (5:3-5). The Message puts it like this, “There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we’re never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can’t round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!” The old Don Potter song says, “I will greatly rejoice, even though for a while. I’ll be put to the test by various trials. For the proof of my faith is more precious than gold, refined by His fire, it cannot be told. I will gird up my mind enduring this race, being sober in this time, hoping in His grace. Taking captive every thought in obedience to Christ, denying the lusts that once ruled my life. Preparing the way the best that I can, For it is written, You shall be Holy, as I am.”

This all goes back to what will we do when adversity comes my way? And it does. Frequently. How do I respond? Do I turn into a drama freak and rant and rave and throw a complaining tantrum? Do I hide my head under the covers and try to ignore it hoping it will go away? Do I confront it head on and turn it into an opportunity to grow? The last one is what I know I should do, but sometimes I want to vent and spew all my opinions out. I have a “right” to an opinion, after all. Surely God knows that, right? I’ve done plenty of that I’m sure over the years. But it is funny sometimes when I do react well. Once, on a freezing cold winter night, I was leaving my friend’s dorm room. I walked out to the car and discovered the stereo completely ripped out, CDs gone. I recall that my reaction was calm and collected, so much so that my friend Dave said, “Why are you not angry? I would be spitting mad right now.” But then some little thing will come along and annoy me to the point of frustration or cause me to become upset. And I say, “Gosh, why did that small thing create such a reaction in me?” Don’t sweat the small stuff, is the old saying… but a lot of time those small things are what set us off. Little foxes, who spoil the vine says Solomon in 2:15. 

This is where we are real. This is where people see who we really are. How we react during the stressful moments of life is an indicator of how much healing we need, isn’t it? If I am constantly flipping out because I am choosing to react based on other people’s choices and how they are affecting me, then I need to examine why that is. I had to learn to Keep Calm and Carry On. It’s honestly a powerful lesson. It used to fire me up when people would be late to a set meeting with me. How dare they show up ten minutes late. My time is valuable, and if they respected me, they would respect my time. And if they did not have the courtesy to call… oh boy. (Ok, that one STILL gets me going. It’s 2013. Pick up a phone!) But I really had to learn not to let it get to me. Deal with it and move on, as Jeremy often told me. Let it go. It simply is not worth the energy and frustration. I believe that the more I went through healing for some of the issues in my life, the more understanding I became about why people are the way they are. It has helped me become more empathetic and less tyrannical. (Not to say I have completely achieved this.) A few years ago one of the buzzwords around the ministry here was “be transparent.” I didn’t care for that statement and resisted it because the truth (for me) was that if people were actually transparent (Allowing light to pass through so that objects behind can be distinctly seen.) not a single one of us would like what we saw – in them or in ourselves. Sometimes the most ugly, horrible thought can come out of nowhere. I would certainly never want to say that, and push it away immediately when it happens, but can you imagine if someone could actually see our innermost thoughts and feeling on a big screen? Can you imagine being transparent for real? I get the concept – be honest, be real, be who you are. That’s the point. But I like words and take them fairly literally. Then the phrase “authenticity” came along and that is a little more realistic to achieve. People are looking for that — authenticity. Maybe that is why people who study the Bible have such a connection with Peter. They seems him as a guy who stuck his foot in his mouth often, dove in headlong to situations without thinking, and was so fiery and passionate about life. Surely he had part Italian in him, after all, the Italians named a big church in the middle of Rome after him! Seriously though, we look at Peter and say – this guy was real. He was authentic. And guess what… he had plenty to say on adversity. “Dear friends, don’t be surprised at the fiery trials you are going through, as if something strange were happening to you. Instead, be very glad — for these trials make you partners with Christ in his suffering, so that you will have the wonderful joy of seeing his glory when it is revealed to all the world!” Sound familiar? Sound like he might have had a few talks with his buddy Paul?

So here I am, thinking about adversity. A lady I know was robbed last night. It was probably younger people because they trashed the house. They threw milk and beets and pickles all over the walls and living room, trashed the kitchen and bedrooms. They stole their Macbook but left the backup drive. I saw the photos and I can’t imagine coming home to that. She was just in here a few minutes ago and is getting things together for insurance. How would I respond to that? I think I would be sick. I am not concerned with “stuff” that can be replaced. I think for me it would be those things that can’t be replaced — photos, significant mementos from family. Yet, I look at those who have gone before me – those heroes of the faith who gave it all up for the sake of serving Christ and I think, “Wow. Do I hold tightly to things that ultimately do not have eternal value? Does adversity, or even the thought of adversity, cause me to hold tighter or let go?” I remember standing in my sister’s shop this last fall and she had spray painted that phrase on the inside of the barn door. “Let it go.” When you leave this place, let whatever it is that is bothering you, go. Don’t take the worry; don’t take the stress; don’t take it with you. Let it go. Ultimately, when we move on from this life to the next, we take nothing with us but what we have stored up in eternity. Those treasures on earth will burn, rust or be stolen. What we store in heaven are a result of those “momentary light afflictions” which worked in us greater weights of glory – rewards. They refined us, they caused us to become people of character, of depth, of intimacy. Those adversities took us to places low so that we could understand how amazing it is for the Lord to be the lifter of our heads! Peter says it like this: “So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you” (5:6). Like Misty says… “It’s the inside outside upside down kingdom. Where you lose to gain and you die to live.”

My desire is to live authentically. To speak truth. To love well. To face adversity with humility, steadiness and confidence that the Lord is more than able to provide a way out when there seems to be no way; knowing that this adversity is refining me to be pure and is working a greater weight of glory in me that will carry on into eternity.